“Is this the person God has for me?”
The question echoes in your heart as you stare at your phone, waiting for their text.
You’ve prayed about your relationship countless times.
You’ve made lists of pros and cons.
You’ve sought advice from friends and family.
Yet that persistent question remains.
How do you really know if someone is “the one”?
We understand this uncertainty because we’ve walked that path too.
The journey of finding a life partner is filled with both excitement and anxiety.
It’s one of life’s biggest decisions, after all.
But what if discerning God’s will for your relationship could be less mysterious and more meaningful?
Do you have more questions?
Did you have more questions or are you wanting to grow in your faith?
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Looking Beyond Feelings
Our culture tells us that when we meet “the one,” we’ll just know.
Fireworks will explode.
Music will play.
Everything will magically fall into place.
But God’s guidance rarely comes through overwhelming feelings alone.
Think of feelings as the sail of a boat—powerful and important, but not the rudder.
The wind of emotion can propel us forward, but we need something more substantial for direction.
In Proverbs 4:23, we’re reminded to “guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.”
This means bringing both our hearts and minds into alignment with God’s wisdom.
It means looking beyond butterflies to building blocks of lasting love.
Aligning with God’s Values
“The one” isn’t primarily about finding your perfect match.
It’s about finding someone who’s perfectly matched with God’s purpose for your life.
2 Corinthians 6:14 advises us not to be “unequally yoked with unbelievers.”
This isn’t just about sharing a faith label.
It’s about sharing core values, spiritual direction, and life vision.
Ask yourself: Does this relationship draw you closer to Christ or distract you?
Do you share the same fundamental values about family, service, and faith?
Can you picture serving God together for decades to come?
The right relationship won’t just feel right temporarily.
It will fit right permanently with the person God is shaping you to become.
Need Prayer?
Life can be overwhelming, which is why many turn to prayer—a simple conversation with God—for strength, hope, and peace. The Bible reminds us that prayer is powerful and meaningful. Whatever you're facing, we’d be honored to pray for you or your loved ones. You're not alone, and we’re here to partner with you in prayer.
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Seeking Wisdom in Community
No major decision in the Christian life was meant to be made in isolation.
Proverbs 15:22 tells us that “plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”
Those who know you best often see what you cannot.
They notice the way your face lights up when you talk about this person.
Or they observe how you become less like yourself when you’re together.
Invite trusted mentors, family members, and spiritual leaders into your discernment process.
Not for their permission, but for their perspective.
The Holy Spirit often speaks through the community of believers surrounding us.
Their collective wisdom creates a clearer picture than our sometimes clouded judgment.
Practical Discernment Steps
Prayer should permeate every aspect of your relationship.
Not just “God, is this the one?” prayers.
But prayers for wisdom, patience, and clear vision.
Observe how you handle conflict together.
Anyone can seem perfect when everything’s going well.
Character reveals itself when challenges arise.
Take your time and see all seasons of the person.
Dating through holidays, stressful work periods, and family gatherings reveals much.
Discuss your non-negotiables honestly and early.
About faith practices, children, finances, and lifestyle expectations.
Find Community
We all have a deep need for connection, but building meaningful relationships isn’t always easy. That’s why we’ve created welcoming spaces where you can meet new people and build authentic community. No matter where you are in your faith journey, you’re invited to explore, grow, and belong here.
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Frequently Asked Questions
How long should we date before knowing if they’re “the one”?
There’s no magic timeline, but rushing rarely leads to wisdom. Give yourselves enough time to experience various situations together and to see consistent character, not just best behavior.
What if I’m still unsure after praying for clarity?
God often speaks through peace that develops over time rather than immediate clarity. Continue seeking Him while moving forward cautiously, watching for either increasing peace or persistent doubt.
Should I feel 100% certain before getting engaged?
Few people experience complete certainty. Even Abraham “went out not knowing where he was going” (Hebrews 11:8). Faith often means taking the next step with trust rather than having the entire path illuminated.
What if my family doesn’t approve of the relationship?
Take their concerns seriously. Ask specific questions about what they observe. While their approval isn’t absolutely required (especially for unhealthy family dynamics), dismissing legitimate concerns from those who love you is unwise.
Walking Forward in Faith
Finding “the one” isn’t about discovering a perfect person.
It’s about finding someone committed to growing alongside you.
Someone who helps you become more like Christ, not just more comfortable.
The beautiful truth is that “the one” is partly found and partly built through years of faithful commitment.
Marriage isn’t just about finding the right person.
It’s about becoming the right person together.
Because the journey toward marriage is too important to walk alone.
And discerning God’s best for your relationships is something we’re honored to help you discover.
Your love story matters—not just to you, but to the God who authored love itself.
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If you want to learn more, have questions, need prayer, or want to get in touch with our church — simply fill out the form below to connect!
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